Lost And Searching: Prepping for Asia - making plans, changing plans

I asked to be dropped off a few meters away from my parents' house. My big backpack on my back, the small one on my belly and like this I walked up to the front door. I rang the bell. My heart was beating out of my chest! How will she react? She won't faint on me, right? Or worse...?!

The next few seconds seemed so long! They were filled with hope, excitement, fear, happiness,...lots of emotions!

I hear footsteps in the hallway, my heartrate going up even higher! I hear a hand opening the door and then I see a face that I was long hoping to see again. My mom's gentle eyes were filled with disbelief. She looked at me as if she has seen a ghost! For a few seconds she couldn't react, she just stared at me, blinking her eyes to test if she was awake and not dreaming. I can imagine that she has dreamt about this lots of times, but never thought her dreams would come true.

Disbelief turned into hysteria. She started crying. "My baby is home, my baby is home" Tears of joy. I now see how big her missing was. It filled my heart with joy but also with guilt that I had put her through this.

A second later I found myself in the hallway, 2 backpacks and 2 crying parents hanging on me. It was the best feeling in the world!

After a sleeping marathon, I started seeing lots of my friends, telling my travel story, catching up on local news. Who got engaged, who bought a house or is building one, who's pregnant,...all things I can't relate to, but nice to hear.

Now, almost 3 weeks later, it's time to move on again. I packed my backpack, but this time I'm smarter! It's half as heavy and only 70% of the contents of last time. While traveling you learn that you don't need as much as you think you do. One of the basics: underwear. Last time I packed enough to last me for 2 weeks! You never know when you need a clean pair...but I learned that you can do handwashes in the hostels. The only thing is that you have to expose them to dry, so take some decent ones with you ;)

So, Sunday I have a flight to Jakarta. You might have heard the sad news: there have been some incidents in the city and they are expecting more to come, according to my local sources. What to do??

What are the odds that there are two consecutive incidents in the same place? We have witnessed the same kind of concern in Paris some time ago. Even in Brussels people were scared and life had even 'stopped' there for a few days. But is this really what we want? To live in fear and stay inside for the rest of our days? Who knows how long this will go on. This can happen all over the world, so in fact you don't know where on earth you're completely safe. I could go out in my hometown and get hit by a car...

This is why I decided not to cancel my flight on Sunday. I am still going, but I've changed my travel itinerary, because I don't want to step into the lion's cage myself...

There is a possibility to postpone my meditation course to the beginning of March. For me this was one of the most important experiences during my trip in Asia, so no way I would miss out on this! I will explore another region in the meantime and return when things cool down in Jakarta...

I really enjoyed coming home for a while. I was surprised to have the feeling of 'coming home', something that I haven't felt for a long time in Belgium. After half a year I was starting to forget what I had left behind. I left behind a good life, full of friendship, love and wonderful people. I'm glad this trip has reminded me about all of this.

Thank you all for the warm welcome home, the loving messages, the thight hugs and kisses and the time you freed up to meet with me and hear my stories.